The 10 Worst Movie Trilogies of All Time

5. Big Momma’s House

The Big Momma’s House

Putting a man in a fat suit is not comedy. It’s one of the laziest gags in comedy film history and yet filmmakers continue to think it’s a good idea. Gender swapping is also pretty lowbrow unless it’s handled with extreme care. In Big Momma’s House, that is not the case. In fact, Big Momma’s House borrows elements from the worst comedy movies and manages to make them worse. It’s not as if Big Momma’s House had to live up to the high bar set by Some Like it Hot, but it could have at least used the gender bender premise to gain some legitimate laughs. Unfortunately, the movie is a laugh-free mess.

With that in mind, how the hell did it get two sequels? Who was complaining about the lack of crossdressing action comedies starring Martin Lawrence? Unlike several other trilogies on this list (Atlas Shrugged, Bloodrayne), the Big Momma’s House series is legitimately popular. That’s perhaps the most perplexing thing about it. A large chunk of the population helped a laugh-free snoozefest become a “hit” comedy series. Those who managed to skip the series should count themselves lucky. Its box office success hardly equates to quality.


4. Atlas Shrugged

Ayn Rand’s writing is generally considered pretty polarizing in large part because of her controversial political views. Her most noteworthy novel, Atlas Shrugged, is no exception. Plenty of people despise the 1,200 page epic, but just as many people consider it a literary masterpiece. In contrast, there’s a pretty clear consensus on the quality of the recent three-part adaptation of Rand’s novel. The Atlas Shrugged film trilogy is cheap, misguided, and poorly written.

It’s bad enough that each film in the trilogy has a completely new cast due to budget constraints, but that’s not even close to the only issue. Rand’s theory of objectivism is admittedly right-leaning, but these movies lean more toward tea-party values than the complex set of ideas presented by the author. Basically, the filmmakers successfully alienate fans of the source material by completely butchering Rand’s big ideas.

On top of that, the puny budget means that the grandiose scale of the source material can’t properly be replicated. The movies all look like they’re made for television. The amateurish production design pairs well with the misunderstood themes because it’s a constant reminder that this series is nothing but a cash grab aimed at pseudo intellectuals.

To add to that, the dialogue is robotic, the editing is sloppy, and the lack of subtlety is laughable. Nothing works in any of these movies. Each film in the series is as painfully amateurish as the last. Though the book has plenty of detractors, there’s obvious literary merit to be found. The film trilogy proved it was devoid of merit the minute the first line of dialogue was spoken in Part 1. Even Ayn Rand’s biggest fans would be wise to avoid these movies.


3. The Human Centipede


People often avoid The Human Centipede series as a result of the disturbing subject matter. Little do these people know that The Human Centipede flicks are worth skipping for another reason; they’re terrible. Sure, these movies are worth avoiding because they’re unsettling, but they’re also incompetent attempts at horror that rely on shock value rather than cinematic value. In an attempt to balance satire, horror, and cringe, The Human Centipede movies ultimately do nothing well. Due to countless inconsistencies, Tom Six has create a movie series with absolutely no appeal.

The nicest thing that can be said is that the first movie has some clever dialogue in between scenes of characters defecating into each other’s mouths. Sometimes the characters say funny things, and then you’re reminded shortly after that this movie is about people being sewn mouth to anus. Shortly after this, you’re reminded that there’s absolutely no point to any of this. It all amounts to Tom Six trying to prove that he can make people uncomfortable. Mission accomplished – now maybe he can try to prove that he’s capable of making a decent film.


2. Bloodrayne

Who allowed Uwe Boll to make not one, not two, but three Bloodrayne movies? By the time Bloodrayne was released, there had already been a petition for the abhorred director to retire from filmmaking. This came after a literal boxing match between him and some rather aggressive film critics. In other words, people had voiced concerns about Boll’s directing capabilities. That, unfortunately, did not stop him from finishing up the abominable Bloodrayne film series. Over a six-year period, Boll slapped together three god awful adaptations of a video game series that was pretty forgettable to begin with.

To be fair, most of Uwe Boll’s movies are borderline unwatchable. In fact, he has multiple trilogies that could have made it onto this list. There’s something remarkably terrible about the Bloodrayne movies though. The Dungeon Siege movies are bad, but they’re at least capable of telling a coherent story. Meanwhile, some people actually find the Rampage trilogy to be trashy fun.

The Bloodrayne series, on the other hand, is as incomprehensible as it is dull. One would think that the silly video games could feasibly be made into some sort of guilty-pleasure action series akin to the Underworld movies, but that’s not the case. Every Bloodrayne movie is as mind-numbingly dull as the last.

If the Bloodrayne movies were at least entertaining, they could pass as guilty pleasures. The amateurish direction, wooden acting, and sloppy editing could be forgiven if the movies at least provided some sort of escapist fun. A couple entertaining action scenes with some clever one-liners could have saved the series from being flat-out abysmal. Sadly, audiences couldn’t even get that. Instead, they got a tonally jumbled collection of movies that appear to have been made by a third-grader.


1. Troll

To be fair, the Troll “trilogy” is a trilogy in name only. Each Troll movie is completely unrelated to the previous one. In fact, Troll 2 and Troll 3 don’t even feature trolls. The conclusion seems to be that Troll 2 was deemed so unwatchable that it needed some sort of name recognition to earn a few bucks. Thus, they slapped it with the Troll brand and shipped it out. Troll 3 was (un)lucky enough to get the same treatment. The films are only related by name and by the fact that they were shot in Italy. Beyond that, they can be “enjoyed” in whatever order the typical masochist wishes to view them.

While Troll 2 is undoubtedly the worst movie in the series, the other two movies are also piss-poor attempts at cinema. Considering the fact that this list is dedicated to trilogies rather than individual movies, it would be fair to give each movie the same amount of recognition. Each movie in the series is an abomination in its own special way. The original Troll is a low-budget horror flick with off-brand Where the Wild Things Are monsters, Troll 2 rivals The Room in sheer ineptitude, and the third film has murderous plants because of course it does.

Although the Claudio Fragasso trainwreck gets all the credit, the Troll trilogy as a whole is an absolute disaster. It’s not just because they slapped together three movies and called it a trilogy. Rather, it’s such a disastrous trilogy because the movies are abominations with zero redeeming qualities between the three of them. Although they approach so-bad-it’s-good territory in spots, they generally fall within the category of frustratingly bad. Every minute spent watching a Troll movie is a minute wasted.

Author Bio: Justin is a paraprofessional teaching assistant and full-time film enthusiast with a degree in English. When he’s not writing about films, he’s probably watching them in his spare time.